Let me tell you what I think about everyday, what I'm so obsessed about solving that it made me move in with my parents after college & quit my job 3 months ago to do it fulltime.

...it's how to help college students study better & never feel like they are studying alone.

When I joined college back in 2005 as an electrical engineering freshman, the first CPEG class had around 100 students and it was pretty exciting to think that we were all on our way to becoming engineers. Fast forward to graduation 4 years later and there were only 18 that had the blue & gold tassles. What happened??!! The more I thought about it, the more I realized that it wasn't that those who abandoned ship were dumber than me or didn't have a good work ethic. In fact it was something I knew only too well.

During my engineering education days, I was able to deal with the tough courses and the unsympathetic professors but what I couldn't deal with at times, was the sense of loneliness. I felt like an outsider looking in, where I had so many questions about what I was learning, where my non engineering friends couldn't understand what I was going through & the feeling that no one in the program could care less whether I stuck through engineering or not.

I decided to aggressively fight this depressing state of mind by persistently nagging my smart classmates to hang out with me, go to all the TA sessions, go to as many of the professor's office hours & seek out personal tutorial help. Not only did I do better in class but more importantly, I felt a real connection with my academic community. 

That's when I started wondering that what if we could take this whole social academic experience online. How awesome would it be that the night before an exam, no matter where you are or how late you're studying, you could always ask a question and have your classmate or a tutor answer it. Professors with already full inboxes, who suck at responding a lot of times coz of students asking the same questions over and over again, can now find relief. The idea behind this is that even though we are competitors & we are not best friends with all our classmates, we are all in this together so why not connect, help & motivate each other. 

Nfoshare was born out of that need. So that no college student should ever feel like they are alone on this academic journey and that's important.

Its so important because 7 in 10 college students feel stressed out about their studies. Across the country, students are dropping out in droves from science, math and engineering majors. Twenty years from now, there will be 123 million highly skilled and highly qualified jobs available but at this rate, America will only be able to fill 50 million of them. We cannot afford this internal brain drain.

We need students to get pumped up about learning. At Nfoshare, we believe studying should be fun, studying should be social and learning should continue even after class is over.      

 

My latest life experiment has been with running. More specifically, I want to recreate my life in this adrenalin pumped outdoor lab, an ambulatory microcosm of my life's goals & challenges. So if my life goal is to be the best, then I have to run each time like its my best time, especially in harsh and difficult environments. And what follows are life lessons I'm learning everytime I decide to don those kicks.  And trust me, this is an ongoing project.

Lesson 1: You need a mantra

Almost everything I hate about running stems from fear. Fear of the pain and fear of the shame of failing. It's as simple as that.

After I covered a good couple of yards in my challenging pace on my first run, I rapidly started to decrease the mileage in my head. I was afraid of how much it was going to hurt or even worse, that I wouldn't be able to finish it. I purposely tried not to push hard, so that I could decrease the sharp jabs of pain reveberating through my body with each foot pounding the pavement. At this rate, I feared my running experience would be short lived and yield no results.

I realized what I needed was a mantra to adopt while running. I quickly found mine,  'I care not for pain, fear & failure'. It worked brilliantly because at each step whenever I was slowing down or feeling weak, I analyzed why it was happening and if it fell under any one of those categories, I chose not to respond to it.

Amazingly enough, this phrase has now entrenched deep into my pscyhe and I constantly draw upon it whenever I feel like shirking from my goals.

Lesson 2: Imagination is power

When your body is screaming itself to the limits, your caveman side of the brain desperately searches for your motivation in subjecting yourself to this treatment. After a certain point, your mind realizes that if its going to have put up with more of your bullsh*t, it's going to need more from you. It's going to need hope.

Modern civilization is defined by the collective feats of men throughout history, and they were only able to accomplish it because of the most human of characteristics, hope.

Thats what running does. Like any true lab experiment, it filters out all the other noise inside your head. It allows your brain to release these endorphins so as to mitigate the pain and leave you feeling awesome, essentially isolating your mind in the most perfect conditions. Its in a malleable state to rewire and retrain the way you think. Amidst this stressful physical torment, our imagination kicks in and we pull up all our memories, dreams and stories that inspire us, that cheer us and that remind us of what we have faith in. 

Since I have peppered my runs with sharp hills, whenever Im about to tackle one, I personally like to think of the movie '300' and imagine that Im leading my men into battle. Dont judge me...

Lesson 3: Anticipation can kill you

I have realized that running once in a while is fun and refreshing but disciplined running is not. In fact in the hours or the few seconds before my run, my brain will buzz with millions of reasons so as to avoid running. 'Air is too freakin cold....I might get my bronchitis back'. 'My legs are really sore from the previous run....I might pull something'....etc. In fact the 'quiet before the storm' is the most harrowing for me. But these two quotes I heard really convince me otherwise.

First is by General George S. Patton, an Olympic athlete back when he was young, said that "...The body will always give up. It is always tired in the morning, noon, and night. But the body is never tired if the mind is not tired." Wow! The first time I heard that, I realized that my mind can trick the body into submission. Second quote is a famous one but this is something my mom told me to encourage me in my running, "50% of success is just showing up ." Seriously, that's it!!?? If I show up to run, I'm already half way there. That really gets me pumped up everytime.

In life, Im now noticing that I'm becoming better at doing tasks I dislike doing and I'm becoming more consistent everyday. Because most often, its the thinking about doing that work that really stops me from actually doing it.

Lesson 4: Focus

"There is nothing more powerful than being fully present in the moment" is a Zen quote I heard once. It has stuck with me for a while but I didn't fully understand it or apply it till I started running with it. Each time I run, I try to give a Herculean effort and I realized that I run the best when Im fully aware of everything I'm doing. I try to slow down time and immerse myselfy in the full action of my intention. I like to concentrate on the rhythym of my breathing and feel my foot push harder with each step I take. When you become fully aware of the fact that your will, and just your will, is pushing a certain mass through space and time, you can't help but feel grateful for the ability to run.

 

All these lessons help you discover the most important finding about running:

                                                       You find out how immensely powerful you are capable of becoming.

 

Running helps us set a precedent. It helps me prove that if I can do it while I'm physically and mentally exerting myself to the max, then I can definitely translate that to every other aspect of my life. Because each of us needs a reason to believe in ourselves. I need corroboration to show that I really can become the best and I need that proof from within me. 

When we were much younger, we used to believe in the best. The best in ourselves and in others. One can see this when children idolize athletes because they can see the true potential of what they too could become when they grow up.....the best at their game. 

And so to become the best, we need a child's curiosity.

Curiosity starts from a deep sense of personal security, knowing that what you discover about yourself or the world can only help you. In fact, the word 'Curious' is the single definition by which Einstein used to describe himself.  Its something that so simple but yet so powerful that we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for the scores of people before us who chased down their curiosity everyday to the end.

You must believe that against all odds God loves you and has a purpose for you. And armed with that knowledge you have to go out into the world and dream, dream the impossible everyday. 

Step 1. Kids learn to say thank you - Always start your day by being grateful. It's the greatest prayer you can give God. Every morning you wake up, thank God for 5 different things. Change up the 5 things everyday too.

Step 2. Kids actually love to read - Read this. Read that. Read everything! Reading forms the foundation for your brain to start exploring who you are and what you know about the world around you. Learn from the countless before you constantly.

Step 3. Kids love to draw - Create your vision poster. Put pictures, quotes and ideas of all your dreams, your hopes and characteristics of who you want to be on it. Even your most ludicrous dreams go on this. Make it as specific as you want. You can do this on a posterboard with cut out pictures and print outs or you can do it electronically like I do on Google Docs. Read your vision poster everyday and keep refining it. Its the Constitution to your life. (Mine will come up soon)

Step 4. Kids do it without thinking -  Just do it! Set actual measurable goals and go achieve it. Say Im going to achieve this in 2 weeks, this in 2 months and this by the end of year. And then go do it. Courage is a muscle you can only develop by taking risks over and over again.....and over again.

Step 5. Kids don't let boo-boo's stop them...ever - Failure and pain are obvious.  The only thing that matters is how we respond. Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up again. Thank you Batman!

Step 6. Kids go all out - The toughest part of trying to be the best is that you have to be willing to die doing what you love doing, day in and day out. Persistence and hard work define how realistic your dreams can get. We must aim to do every single action, regardless of its importance, with purpose, the purpose of doing it the best we can over and over again.

Life is too short, we are not sure what can happen to us or when it might happen. All we can do is squeeze each and every day out to its fullest and learn to love it!

   

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I see beauty all around me.
I see beauty in my mom's singing & her toothpaste commercial perfect smiles.
I see beauty in my brother's earnestness when he argues with me vehemently on topics of philosophy, morals & religion.
I see beauty in those brief moments of tenderness in my dad amidst our explosive caustic fights.
I see beauty when I catch a glimpse of my car, that I bought with my own hard earned money, while Im rushing to work every morning.
I see beauty when I feel the warmth of the sun on my skin everyday
I see beauty when I stare into the eyes of a beautiful woman
I see beauty when I look back on my hardest & loneliest nights

I feel love when I see a couple look lovingly into each other's eyes
I feel love when I see the stars on a dark night, it allows me to see a sign of how much God loves me
I feel love when I think about my amazing childhood, to have had the best of both worlds
I feel a rush of inspiration when I read or hear about one person somehere around the world overcoming all the obstacles to follow their dream
I feel blessed when I think of the opportunity we got to come to this amazing country
I feel blessed that I can pursue my passion wholeheartedly

At any moment, my life could end but till then
I'm the most blessed man in the world & I'm happy that I know it

Over a week ago after being completely frustrated of the choices I constantly keep making in my life, I Googled the word desperation and Jesus. The first link was an article about the story of the Synagogue leader whose daughter was dying. After having exhausted almost every resource at his disposal, the father was at his wit's end. In his daughter's last dying moments, in an act of utter faith, he left his daughters side and ran to see the strange controversial prophet from Bethlehem. Pushing his way through the crowd, he kneeled at Jesus' feet begging him to come save his daughter. I can see this story so vividly in my head and every part of it rings so true, filled with palpable real emotion throughout. This is the part I love: Jesus instantly responded and followed him to his house. En route, a woman with hemorrhage, considered a total outcast back in those days pushed aggressively through the crowds, and in a giant leap, reached out and touched his cloth. I read both these stories and instantly identified with both so much.

When you get desperate, I mean really desperate, after a point you don't care at all about what others may think about you and in your darkest moment, you act on pure faith in God. You reach out to touch Him. That's all you care about, just His touch. You don't care how your going to achieve it, all you can think of is touching Him. So from deep withing your soul, you scream and you beg uncontrollably for Him to save you.  When I read that something in me clicked, I said Fu*k it, I don't give a damn anymore. I just trust God completely. I just put my faith totally in His grace. I don't care what I do or how much I let myself down, I just trust God. I don't care if I ever become big in life, all I care about is putting my whole life in His hands and I can go to my grave peacefully. Suddenly something clicked. I don't know why but something about that story resonated so deeply with me that I for some reason believe it completely that I don't care about the stagnancy of my startup, the futility of my actions to become a better man, a better leader, my sexual frustrations, all the successful people around me and how much they intimidate me, even how much time I waste.

All I care about is loving God absolutely without any concern of what I actually do.  I'm so happy these days, and so hopeful too. I don't want to jinx it but then again I thought about that and was like screw it, I don't care even when these happy feelings leave, God's grace is enough for me then too. I don't care about my inner spiritual conflict of who will be saved and who wont. I love my life and all the people in it, and I am going to live on my terms. God knows I want those things more than anything else but I stopped worrying about it altogether. Somehow I look at my Vision Poster with hope again, at my goals for each day with hope, at my long hours working at my day job and startup with hope again. Wow